We eventually decided to move out east. One of the first things I did out there was get my license and a vehicle. I had a credit rating of 580, my ex was just slightly higher. They agreed that with both of us they would allow us the car. We went to a place that approved everyone and was high interest. My car payment was 16% interest. I now know how utterly ridiculous that rate is but I had no clue back then. I had biweekly car payments of 160 if I remember correctly. It’s funny because although these were ridiculous prices I still paid it on time every single payment, which in turn made both of our credit scores build very quickly. I had a credit card as well that they kept raising the limit on about every 6 months or so. I passed on some of the offers but took others and eventually I got my 700 credit limit up to 3750. Then we decided to buy our house. My credit rating was now 750 and my ex’s was around 680.Anyways, we applied for a mortgage through a mortgage broker that we had heard about that could get anyone into a home. We were able to get preapproved for 200,000. We found the perfect place and that we wanted and started the purchase. The problem was that the broker told us that he could get us approved for zero down. Even after banks decided not to allow zero down anymore. But after 5 long months of bargaining and fighting with banks, switching the mortgage to a new bank, trying every which way to get us approved- He finally did it. We were moving into our new home that had a higher interest rate because it was zero down and we took along with us our high interest car. It was tough, the mortgage was high, the utilities were like ridiculous time 1000 and the whole process took a toll on the relationship. I don’t think that we were even in the house 6 months before I started having doubts about the relationship. She didn’t see it at that point.
I always had thoughts about the greener grass on the other side of the fence but went along with everything anyway. Then one day I finally started to think it might be time to call it quits. We ended up getting some roommates and moving into different rooms. Problem then became that no one paid their rent on time and the two of us were still responsible for the whole thing. Then she moved on and found a new significant other, as did I. We both decided that it was time to move out. We rented the house to a family. Well guys what… that family didn’t pay the rent either.
We were still managing until her new partner decided that she didn’t want my exs and my names together on anything. At that point she Claimed bankruptcy. They took the car because it was considered part of the assets that she had to liquify (could have kept it if we wanted to and could prove we made the payments but as it was one of the items we shared, she had to get rid of it- this left me with 6505 in debt for a car that I no longer had. Because of the high interest rate and because we were still in the first 2 years there was way more on the car loan than the car was worth)- Then came the house. I was served papers. I was told that I now owned the house with the trustee but that I would need to either buy them out or they would sell it. I wasn’t able to buy them out at the time.
There were other items that I was still responsible for as well like a loan we had. My Ex opted to get a loan for new couches at one point. Was paid off so then we got a dining room set which I believe was on the loan at that time. Then she upped it a little bit so that she could get a computer. Then we upped it even more and I stupidly added my name because separating is expensive and we both needed money to move on. This loan was up to 8000 by that point which was solely all mine once she claimed bankruptcy. I literally had ALL the debt and not a single thing to show for any of it.
I was still so scared to claim bankruptcy that I didn’t for a really really long time. It was over a year after her before I claimed. I was really scared that I would be messing up the rest of my life and what would people think, how could I face people after being bankrupt. I was scared that I would get a better job that would give me a raise and I would have to extend my bankrupt time and pay all of the extra earnings to the trustees. So I procrastinated for a full year.
I searched and searched for personal stories. If I was able to find one at the time like mine maybe I wouldn’t have been so scared to go in and claim. I didn’t know if I should go to the same one that she went to or if I should go to a completely different one of my own. I thought my life would have been over. I let the debt pile up and pile up. I had no way to even touch it.
I made 820 at my job take home biweekly at that point and it was salary so there was no option for overtime. My cell phone was paid by work.
1640 – Monthly take home pay
750- Rent (all inclusive including cable and internet/ no laundry on site)
50- Laundry (laundry was expensive because I had to cab there and back and it was 5 bucks a load)
250- Groceries/ pet supplies
200- Spending money